Anyone who has seen me wandering around the grid, either hanging out or searching for my next story, will know that if there is one thing I don't really try to achieve with my "look", it's cuteness. However, with the current love affair that SL is having with the Tiny avatar, I, like everyone else, want to get involved, especially with all the great things and adventures that are available within the tiny community (much like the Loco Poco's treasure hunt that we explored recently). So I decided I would go on a bit of a shopping spree, to see if I could find myself a tiny avatar that was not quite so, well, cute. A badass Tiny, if you will.


The first thing that caught my eye was Tedwood Portsmouth's "Death of Tinies costume" (200$L). However, while this neat little outfit, with it's Terry Pratchet inspired name, has a superb gothic charm, and would make the perfect Halloween costume for any Tiny, it still requires wearing a frankly adorable animal avatar underneath, thus making it not exactly what I'm looking for.


I decided to move away from the gothic, and try out something a little more funky and futuristic. After much searching, I found the "Tiny Kabuki Robot" by AKIBE Sixgallery(300$L). This highly detailed avatar combines intricate traditional Japanese patterns and costume, with funky neon robotic styling. However, maybe it's the fact that it's samurai blade is purely decorative, or perhaps it was the quirky cartoon blinking eyes, but when I took the avatar down to the neon city of Insilico, I felt that, although it looked fantastic, it was hardly intimidating and wasn't really making anyone take me very seriously.


Maybe what I needed was something with more muscle. More macho. So what could be better than a tiny wrestler! "Mary's Tiny ;; Fukumen" by makitan Kidd(110$L) matched the bill superbly, turning me into a mini-luchador totally ready to mix it up with any other Lycra clad warriors. I felt the need to try this out, so I headed down to Second Life Championship Wrestling's Ambrodome Arena, where there happened to be a match on. I hung out amongst the audience and the other wrestlers, thinking, "Well, Rey Mysterio can be short and a champion?". But the nail was hammered into my badass wrassler image when Katheryn Blackadder, winner of the match that night, spotted me, and said "Check out the lil luchador! How Cute!". Failed again, I guess.


Back searching again, I decided that if anyone could make a tiny avatar with attitude, it would be a brand called "Fucker Family". "Skeleton Boy" by Karshr Demonia(150$L) mixes urban street style along with a dark supernatural monster charm. An undead dude with punk sensibilities. You can even buy a rock and roll guitar or bass, that plays a kickass riff when you type. What could be more badass than that! I was all happy to call it a day there, and say that I had found the avatar I'd been looking for, but it just so happened that I had bought a gift for someone that I couldn't transfer. I called the creator over to my land, and was discussing the problem, and once I'd finally come to an agreement with her, as a parting comment, she turned to me, and said "btw, your avatar is very cute". ARGH!

So, I decided, I needed something that could never be called cute. Something that, regardless of size, would strike fear into the heart of any avatar. I needed to get properly scary. And then I found it:


"Evil Clown Tiny Avatar" by Jenne Dibou's Mechanical Toy Factory(490$L) is NOT cute. From it's automaton metal skin, to the burning red eyes and little razor sharp teeth, and the fact that it is an evil clown, it has everything you need to intimidate any avatar you bump into. Pleased that I had finally found something that no-one could call cute, I started showing off my find to my friends. And they all agreed that it was indeed a completely uncute tiny. They also agreed that unless I changed out of the avatar, they might feel the need to run away screaming.

So, in conclusion, it is possible to find a tiny avatar that is not cute. However, whether it is possible to find such an avatar, without your friends hiding behind sofas and pretending not to be around when you call, is quite another matter. I guess there are worse things than being cute.